Parenting: Care for your child is good but over doing is harmful

In this age when most people are opting for smaller families with 1 or 2 kids, pampering of the child is increasing. Young educated couple want to give the best to their child. though it is not bad to do so, sometimes care is overdone. This has adverse effects on the physical as well as mental and emotional development of the child.

The working couple of this modern times is one of the most conscious parent who has great intentions, but due to lack of elderly advice in rearing children, sometimes more harm is done than good. First time parents are themselves trying to come to terms with the responsibility of a newlyborn. Emotional well being of the parent is very important at this stage of life. Seeking advice from an elder in the family
to deal with your child is the best way to go about.

Some mothers treat her child as a delicate doll. Even the slightest of pain caused to the child is a cause for a much greater distress in the 'protective' parents. Being protective about your child is good, but overprotectiveness can be dangerous. Everything in proportion is good - so is the case with protectiveness. The parents view of every aspect of life is very important as it is this view that is imprinted in the child's mind. If you get distressed with small thing, so is your child bound to be. Childhood is the formative year of our thought process. It is the parents, and specially the mother, who moulds her child. Correct assessment of situation is learned trait. Out of proportion anxiety expressed by the 'overconcerned' mother will condition the child in a very different way.

What all parents want is to give everything to their child what they could not have. They want him to play with the most expensive toys. All her wishes are fulfilled. But remember, this is not how this competitive world functions. Realism is what you should teach your child which will help him/her to cope with the harsh realities of life. Teach your child the value of hardwork and achievement. Fulfill the wishes as a reward for hardwork rather than fulfilling the wish after a temper tantrum.

Giving the right award for good action and appropriate punishment or withholding punishment for wrong action should always be consistent. For the same action, if you do not react on one occasion and beat the child black and blue the next time, child's mind is bound to get confused.

If you have a kid, BE CAREFUL!! Your every action is being watched by your child.

If you have any query, feel free to ask me, I will be glad to help.

Dr. Sumit Periwal



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